Men are just big babies

Wednesday, November 19, 2008 10:11 PM | Claire (Administrator)

If you are following along... here comes reason #3

Before I had my daughter, I heard other women use the term "men are just big babies" all the time. I didn't pay any attention to it, because I didn't have anything to compare it to... but now, oh yeah. I can definitely say that I agree.  How does this affect our relationships?

Well, the first three months, we are too tired, sleep deprived and annoyed to really pay any attention to it, then we start getting some sleep and actually looking around and comparing our babies and our husbands, at this point it is REALLY annoying... we find ourselves thinking... "he's a grown man and he's acting like at two year old", and really sometimes it's like a two year old throwing a tantrum.  Looking back now, I see that men in generally were always like that, but now we have a REAL baby and we don't want to baby our husbands anymore, we want them to grow up really fast and take care of us... but they have not jumped on to the band wagon as yet. They will, from a combination of us bugging them about it, realizing that we need the help, and us not babying them anymore, but it will take some time and it will not come easily. and really why would they want to give up all they had before just because there is another addition to the family?  one of the struggles moms face is that we resent the fact that they haven't grown up as fast as us (even though we had the nine months to prepare). We used to be babies too, we would baby our hubby, our hubby would baby us... then we ave a baby and grow up but our hubby isn't getting it yet. I'm not a big fan of making excuses for dads, but the fact is, we did get that nine months, it prepared us for motherhood, they don't have that same experience, nor do they have the instant bond and link that we have, so we have to try to be patient with them until they get it.

Around 6 month, when the baby becomes more social and starts interacting, dads generally stop acting like a baby and transition to about a four year old. They still would like for you to do things for them, but if they HAVE to, they do it themselves, BUT... and it's a big but... ONLY IF THEY HAVE TO!  So mommies, your job is to show them that they can do it and they will have to do it and before you know it you may have a husband who is acting like a teenager - even doing the dishes once in a while, at that point I say be happy with that for a year and then start the training again... :-)

Around a year, things just balance out, the pressure of the first year is over, your baby can eat most foods, everyone is getting more sleep, there is less restrictions which translates to less stress for mom, meaning less stress for dad. Everyone knows their role in family. By this time, you may (if you are lucky) have a husband who acts his age. Don't be alarmed if once in a while he acts like a baby again... given the chance he will.

Our Community

Life With A Baby
LWAB Foundation

Our Partners

Click here to visit this Mount Sinai's website

© 2020 Life with A Baby, Inc. All Rights Reserved.