You are here. You have officially entered this new phase of life called motherhood. Amidst all the adjustments that being a new parent brings, such as the late nights and early morning feedings, you notice that you are living in a completely new body which is foreign to you. 

You tell yourself that once you have this baby, you’ll start working on getting back to your pre-pregnancy weight. But the reality is, sometimes we can never return to how things were. All we can do is keep moving forward and adjusting to the various “new” norms we will experience over the course of our lives. 

And that applies to our post-pregnancy bodies as well. Bodies change all the time. It is sometimes hard for the human psyche to accept, but it’s true. Expect your body to change and evolve over time as you age, beyond the pregnancy journey.

Here are some reflections to consider as you learn to love your body again - just the way it is.

It’s a Mindset

The way we view ourselves and our bodies starts in our minds first. If we view our bodies in a negative light, more often than not, we will treat our bodies in the same way we see them. It also doesn’t help that we live in the age of the BBL body type, where if you don’t look like a Kardashian, you are not deemed as beautiful. It’s hard to be a woman these days, but we must build the mental resilience to love our bodies as they are. It starts with us first. A good book to help you relearn how to love your body is The Body is Not An Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor.

Expectations vs. Reality

We are constantly bombarded with images of women who have seemingly bounced back to their pre-pregnancy bodies after giving birth, which hasn’t been the case for some of us. We sometimes fail to realize that recovering from pregnancy takes a long time, even after giving birth. Did you know it takes up to six weeks for your uterus to return to its normal position? Or that 1 in 2 women develop a pregnancy condition called diastasis recti which causes thinning and separation of our abdominal muscles?  Our bodies need the time to rest and regenerate from the pregnancy experience. This is why it is just as important to understand what happens to our bodies after pregnancy as much as what happens to them during pregnancy.  Be kind to yourself, we only have one body and how we treat it is important for our overall health. 

Transitioning into your Mom-Bod

Despite the images we see in the media, the reality is that no one “snaps back” from pregnancy so soon after giving birth–or sometimes, at all. Every “body” is different. There are hundreds of fitness exercises for new moms or even fitness classes to attend that not only help you lose weight but also heal from the various pregnancy conditions you may have experienced during the labour and delivery process. If you’re not ready to create a fitness routine as yet, tons of blogs and websites offer styling tips for dressing your body in its current state. We recommend blogs such as Who What Wear, Rookie Moms and Toronto New Mom as resources for your transition. Another tip would be starting a journaling practice documenting your motherhood journey and the changes you are experiencing in real-time as you navigate this new body. Keep in mind that this is a journey and not a race. Take the time to heal, rest and get to know your body in the state that it’s in now.

Proactive Measures

In the meantime, there are ways that we can start the journey to accepting our new mom-bods, such as keeping a journal documenting your pregnancy/new mom experience or joining a new mom support group that helps keep our social health in check by relating with other new moms. If you have a midwife or doula, it would be helpful to have some counselling sessions with them as they are equipped. Make plans with your spouse to have regular date nights where you can dress up, put on makeup, get a babysitter and have a meal with your love outside of the home. Before anything else, you are a human being first that just happens to be a mother. Take some time to reconnect back to yourself and the ones you love.

We hope that these reflections are a small piece of your journey as you get acquainted with your new body. A body that nurtures life, love and is ever changing, always evolving.