Today I told a mom friend that her daughter's failure made me very happy.
If you read the sentence without the backstory, you would think I'm a mean mom.
But that's not the case, in fact, I would like to think I'm an open minded supportive mom that advocates for other moms.
So what's the story behind that comment?
This mom friend posted a beautiful picture of her daughter on Facebook, it was her progress report for her swimming class.
Along with the picture, she also wrote that she was a proud
mama of her daughter passing her current swimming level, but not
without having failed preschool swimming multiple times previously.
This made me smile and I immediately messaged her.
What made me smile was the fact that my fellow mama friend
wasn't shy in sharing with others that her daughter, although passed her
swimming level this time, actually had failed many times in the past.
My own daughter, is about to fail preschool swimming. Yes, a 4 year old kid can fail at that age, and that's perfectly ok.
Often times when we see and hear from other parents their
children's progress in life, we only see and hear the good part. We see
accomplishments plastered across social media, we hear praises louder
than the town crier.
But what we don't see and hear are the bumps and bruises along the way.
By only seeing and hearing the good part, and omitting the bad, most
of us inadvertently are made to believe that if there are bumps on the
road with our child's progress, then there must be something wrong with
them. Some might even go as far as think perhaps their child has a
learning disability. Please note that I'm not in any ways dismissing children with
learning disabilities, but for this, I'm referring to the "average"
child in general.
The reality is, every child is different, and we shouldn't treat them like an assembly line.
Just because your child takes a little longer in mastering a
certain skill, does not make your child any less adequate as a human
being. In fact, persistence and perseverance is key in succeeding in
life.
How many successful people do we know that simply "phone it
in" to get to where they are today? I don't know any. All of the successful people I know, they've all
had to keep trying over and over again until they got it, but they
never gave up.

Allowing your child to fail and being ok with it is such a
wonderful thing. They don't know it yet, but what you're doing is preparing
and empowering them with the confidence to face a very competitive world in the future, and with
pizzazz.
So yes, allow our kids to fail many many times, and don't
be ashamed to hide it. Let's stand together in sharing it with other parents, so that
another parent isn't crying behind doors because they think that there couldn't possibly be another child as inadequate as their own, and no, your child is NOT
inadequate, they're merely finding different ways to learn, at their own pace.
Sandy Lynch is an entrepreneur, and mom to two girls.